Although I have not yet learned the purpose of all things, much less the reasoning behind anything... Day by day, Heavenly Father reveals little truths to me through the ever so quiet spirit of the Holy Ghost. How incredible to know that all knowledge, strengthened testimony.. even Korean I am learning will all rise with me! That the things I am earnestly seeking for and often times struggling to learn, will never go to waste! No time on earth is worth a second of waste. This thought alone has made this week.. as hard as it was.. worth it. But do you want to know what makes it even more worth it?? When we are privileged with even but a glimpse of His purpose... a slice of understanding to our Father's grand design. "There is no such thing as a coincidence, only God working under an anonymous name. Each and every investigator, I will have.. has been called and selected and elected to be my investigator.. as long as I remain worthy and listening to the promptings of the spirit. This same principle applies to each companion, president and leader I will have throughout my mission. However, I hadn't realized how true these words would ring to my MTC teachers. I absolutely love my teachers!!! Both Brother Scoville and Sister Simonson have been exactly what I have needed... in my high points as well as in my low points. Their spirit, testimony and faith have encouraged me every single day and I am getting anxiety attacks thinking about when I have to say goodbye. Each day I leave their lessons with more and more motivation to serve the people of Korea! To someday speak the language like them. To dedicate my life to missionary work.
I am often quick to forget that I was not called on a mission to Seoul, Korea to simply speak Korean.. Even though it's easy to think that when all I do is jam my mind with Hongumar...... No, I was called to represent our Savior Jesus Christ, to spread the Plan of Salvation to the children of God.. To share the testimony of Sister Jamie Willcox through the promptings of the Holy Ghost. I can't say I've always loved bearing my testimony.. especially not at the girl's camp bawl fests. But in the latter years of my life, I have enjoyed strengthening my own testimony with each bearing and have looked forward to each opportunity. That all changed this week. As a STL, we have the opportunity of... in the wise words of our Branch President, representing the Celestial Branch by being the very first people to welcome the new Korean missionaries. Usually I would say I'm pretty okay meeting new people, hardly ever intimidated... But how could I not be when one of our responsibilities was to bear our testimony in Korean???!??!?!??!? Hello, we haven't learned the stating facts grammar form.!!!!! I was a nervous wreck following our Tuesday night branch meeting.... aka only had one day until our new missionaries arrived.! Since our branch meetings follow after Tuesday night devotional and district meeting.. As soon as I got back to our residency with only 20 minutes until quiet time.. I planned out exactly what I needed to accomplish in order to be ready and said an earnest prayer for help. The following morning, I was looking forward to the hour of additional study time we had to really prepare myself... until our DL starts shuffling us to host the new missionaries. Needless to say, I had zero time to prepare.
I don't care who you are or what your story is. God answers our prayers. Whether they be for helping in school, work, relationships or even just in bearing your testimony in a foreign language.. He answers our prayers of help. I woke up yesterday without a clue on how to bear my testimony, but when the time came.. very unexpectedly as our two zone leaders and my fellow STL threw me under the bus and opened the floor up for me first.........................
........ I smiled, stood up in front of our two new districts.. said a prayer... and bore my testimony. Words came to my mouth that I didn't have any recollection of studying. D&C 33:8. Sentences were formed and for the very first time since entering the MTC, I knew exactly what I was saying.. and why I am here. Heavenly Father is earnestly seeking out opportunities to answer our prayers. I promise that as you turn to Him, with everything... Not just just the things you're humbled to rely on Him for, He'll be there. He will answer you, regardless of how He does it. I was nervous for 24 hours. Sometimes, he may answer us immediately and others might take years.. But I know that He does answer them. That He will. That He always will.
"Even before they were born, they, with many others, received their first lessons in the world of spirits and were prepared to come forth in the due time of the Lord to labor in his vineyard for the salvation of the souls of men." (D&C 138:56) This is my own personal work and glory... to do the work of my Savior. To spread the good news of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I know that the Gospel is true. That it is the plan our Heavenly Father created in order for us to return to Him. I know that none can be saved without the redeeming as well as the enabling and purifying powers of the Atonement. I see a miracle every single hour or every single day.. I see the miracle of the Atonement of Jesus Christ working on me.. Slowly, very slowly working on my flaws, weakness and struggles. But they are miracles nonetheless.
On several different occasions this week I found myself in the lowest of moods.. The veil of ministering angels and love has become just as thin as satan's. I was naive in assuming I didn't have to worry about him, he is always waiting.. always tempting.. always placing negative thoughts in our minds. But as soon as he's ready to enter, I witness one of those miracles. Whether it be small and seemingly insignificant, or large and life changing.. The power of God will win every single time. How grateful I am to know that each day can and WILL be better than the last. That the Atonement will not only fix us, but make us new and even better than before!
I hope you enjoyed your trip to California!! You better have given Grandma Call my loving. I would say I'm jealous, but there isn't a place in the entire world I would rather be. Thank you so much for your love and support!! I love you all more than I can ever express! I put all my hand written letters in the mail earlier today, so hopefully you get them before the end of this week!! Sorry for the penmanship... I've become very skilled at characters and print no longer comes easy.. As for this email.. I swear I am losing my ability to talk in English.
Onward, ever onward
All my love,
ps, the pictures won't attach on these computers.. sorry.. I'll send extras next week! Such a bust.. I got a few keepers this week. Ps. ANGIE, SEND ME MORE PICTURES. Gooble gobble I have the most beautiful niece and nephew.
|Polka dots sisters|
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